Same sex civil unions get

green light from mayors

By Phil Garber Managing Editor, Mt. Olive Chronicle, Feb 07, 2007

Mount Olive Township Mayor David Scapicchio will be in the majority of mayors around Morris County when he conducts a civil union ceremony for two lesbians from Hoptacong in March.

It will be the first wedding ceremony for Scapicchio since he was elected in November and the first civil union ceremony after a new state law goes into effect on Feb. 19.

The law was approved by the Legislature and signed by Gov. Jon Corzine after the state Supreme Court had ruled last year that gay couples are entitled to the same rights as heterosexual, married couples. The court, however, stopped short of labeling same sex relationships as “marriages.”

The law says that mayors must either agree to perform both civil union ceremonies and marriage ceremonies or they can’t perform any wedding ceremonies.  Members of the clergy, however, can refuse to perform civil union ceremonies “if doing so would conflict with sincerely held religious beliefs,” according to a statement from Attorney General Stuart Rabner.

NOW Poll

A poll this month by the National Organization for Women (NOW), Morris Chapter, showed that mayors in 22 towns will perform civil union ceremonies for same sex couples; seven said they would not; and 10 municipalities did not respond.

“As mayor, it’s part of my responsibility,” said Scapicchio.  “Who am I to judge?  It’s personal.  Times have changed and it’s not uncommon for men or women to live their lives together.”

Scapicchio could not identify the two women who will be joined in a civil union at town hall but said they have been together for 13 years.  The couple initially asked Hopatcong Mayor Richard Hodson to conduct the ceremony.  But Hodson said in an interview on Friday that he stopped performing any wedding ceremonies last fall because of other responsibilities.

The women then began calling other towns before finding Scapicchio, the mayor said.

“The two women were so excited to find a mayor to do the ceremony,” Scapicchio said.

Scapicchio said he will charge the same fees for marriages and civil unions.  That is $50 if the ceremony is at town hall and $100 if done elsewhere.

He said he asked the two women to pay their fee to the committee working on building a veterans memorial at Turkey Brook Park.  A man and woman to be wed in a ceremony on May 3 at Flanders Valley Farms will pay their fees partly to the Budd lake Fire Department and part to the Flanders Fire and Rescue Squad.

He also said he feels he is in the mainstream in his willingness to perform same sex ceremonies.

People cannot file for civil unions until after the law goes into effect. Meanwhile, registrars from around the state are being trained under the new regulations.

“It’s the law and it’s my obligation,” said Chester Township Mayor Benjamin Spinelli.  “If a same sex couple wants me to do a civil union, I’ll do it.”

Spinelli said the legal ceremony of marriage or civil unions helps couples, whether they are heterosexual or homosexual.

“These people are living together in our communities, they are our neighbors,” Spinelli said.  “If we can untangle some of the legal morass by recognizing them, then we’re doing ourselves a favor and avoiding problems down the road.”

Washington Township Mayor Kevin Walsh said he will perform same sex, civil union ceremonies regardless of his religious views.

“It is my role as mayor to put aside my personal beliefs and act faithfully to the current legislation which allows for civil unions,” Walsh said.  “It is imperative for me to follow the current laws in the state.”

Walsh, who has already married about 10 couples, said there have been inquiries in the township for civil union ceremonies.

In Mendham Township, Mayor Phyllis Florek said the township has had inquiries for same sex civil union ceremonies.  She said she will abide by the law even though she does not feel mayors should have to conduct same sex civil unions.

“The Legislature passed the law and once you take the oath of office, you have an obligation to comply with the law,” Florek said.

Florek also said it is a mayor’s obligation to perform weddings.

“Anyone who wants to be married in the township should be able to do so in front of the mayor,” Florek said.

Mendham’s mayor, Neil Henry, said it is a mayor’s responsibility to perform marriages and that he will also perform the civil commitment ceremonies.

“It’s a lifestyle choice and I respect those who choose that lifestyle,” Henry said.  “If someone requests you to marry them, you should accommodate them.”

According to the NOW survey, in the area, Harding Township and Mine Hill are the only town that won’t be performing civil unions.

In Chester, Borough Clerk Valerie Egan said all inquiries should be directed to Mayor Dennis Verbaro, who didn’t return a call for comment.

Harding Mayor Louis J. Lanzerotti said he announced at the annual reorganization meeting in January that he won’t conduct any weddings or civil ceremonies.  It’s not because of any ethical or religious reasons but more that Lanzerotti said he’s doesn’t feel he is able to do such ceremonies.

“I believe that I am unable to provide the sense of importance, gravitas and solemnity that is required for the profound commitment of two individuals in the bonds of marriage,” Lanzerotti said.

He said he would recommend that those seeking a civil marriage ceremony contact the Clerk of Morris County.

Mine Hill Mayor Richard Leary said he won’t do any weddings or civil unions.

The Gay/Straight Parents Alliance of the Morris chapter of NOW has been polling mayors and will send a Valentine’s Day message to thank those who will cooperate and to encourage those who say they will not conduct same sex ceremonies.

“As parents, we know that you teach your children by example, so we want those mayors who have stood up for acceptance and equality for all families to know that their constituents have noticed and appreciate their positions,” said Heather Turnbull, chair of the alliance committee.

Mayors who won’t perform the ceremonies can expect a letter with a different tone.  The letter will remind mayors that “a message of equality and fairness is the one we want our children to hear and it also more accurately reflects the principles of the citizens of Morris County.”

Turnbull said she was pleased and not surprised that most of the mayors will be performing the civil union ceremonies.

“I’ve always felt the majority of people in New Jersey are open minded,” said Turnbull of Chatham Township.

Turnbull, a retired lawyer, has been in a relationship for 15 years and plans to apply for a civil union ceremony.  She and her partner, also a lawyer, have a 3-year-old daughter.

“It will be very special to us,” Turnbull said of the civil ceremony.  “It doesn’t change our relationship but it grants us a lot of legal benefits.”

Turnbull said many gay couples will benefit from the new civil union agreements.

“This legitimizes relationships and that is very important to a lot of people,” Turnbull said.  “There are a lot of wonderful legal and emotional benefits for people who never felt they would be treated as full members of the community.”

©Recorder Community Newspapers 2007